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Post by WhutScreenName on Dec 12, 2022 17:27:15 GMT
you can fix dad leaving the brand new computer on all night, through software. on my laptop, you go to settings, system, power & sleep; to get to the settings for what it does if it's left idling. I would expect it to be the same on a desktop only without the "on battery" line in the power & sleep menu. I have mine set to go to sleep if I leave it idling for an hour; and turn off the screen after a half hour (plugged in) What everything in my life comes down to is the question of if I need to remain where I am or head on out. A part of me is yearning to head out somewhere, try my luck in starting over, and see what happens while I still have some level of physical and mental ability to do so. Another part of me is saying that if I leave, this entire town is probably done for. I'm basically propping up my parents, the newspaper, and based on the reactions I get a number of local charities. I'm also helping to hold up the congregation I go to, and am doing a fair bit online for various groups as well. Sounds to me like you're continuing to not only put others before yourself, but also putting more on your shoulders than is healthy. Part of being an adult is understanding that NO is a viable, and responsible answer. That said, IF you left your parents, and IF something happened, you'd feel responsible. Is that a burden you're willing to bare? |
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Post by GTCGreg on Dec 12, 2022 18:21:56 GMT
you can fix dad leaving the brand new computer on all night, through software. on my laptop, you go to settings, system, power & sleep; to get to the settings for what it does if it's left idling. I would expect it to be the same on a desktop only without the "on battery" line in the power & sleep menu. I have mine set to go to sleep if I leave it idling for an hour; and turn off the screen after a half hour (plugged in) What everything in my life comes down to is the question of if I need to remain where I am or head on out. A part of me is yearning to head out somewhere, try my luck in starting over, and see what happens while I still have some level of physical and mental ability to do so. Another part of me is saying that if I leave, this entire town is probably done for. I'm basically propping up my parents, the newspaper, and based on the reactions I get a number of local charities. I'm also helping to hold up the congregation I go to, and am doing a fair bit online for various groups as well. In addition to physical and mental ability, you also need the financial ability. Do you make enough to even think about moving out from your parents? I would think the first step is to get a job that pays enough to survive on your own. Then you can come up with a plan to make tracks. |
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Post by wvengineer on Dec 12, 2022 18:31:12 GMT
If an entity has to rely one one person or a small group of people to exist, then it is inherently unstable and unhealthy. I have dealt with that a few times at various jobs. I will commonly ask: "What will you do if XYZ decides to take a month long vacation? Or worse yet, what if they get killed on the way home from work one day?" If they don't have contingency plans, then they are setting themselves up for failure.
Such a system is inherently unhealthy for you because as long as they rely on you to do what needs done, there is no reason for them to fix their problems that make them rely on you to start with. They have no incentive to change and won't until they are forced to.
The worst part is that when you start pulling yourself back, their reaction is likely be to blame you for hurting them instead of seeing that they are the cause of the problem. Expect them to lay the guilt on thick. That is when you need to hold strong to yourself and not give in to their please and pressure to come back. You have to hold strong because if you give in and come back, it will go right back to them over using you right away. Organization normally do not change until they are forced to and many will only do so kicking and screaming.
If an organization (family, church, company, etc) is so unstable that it relies on just a few people to function, then it is going to fail at some point. The question is now do you let it drag you down with it or do you get out and save yourself with as much of your health as you can get.
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Post by wvengineer on Dec 12, 2022 19:41:06 GMT
The engineering term for this is a "Single Point of Failure". The one element of a system that if it breaks will result in the shutdown of the whole system. You, Iron, are that element in these systems. I would not be surprised that these organizations know you are a SPF, but don't want take the action to fix it. It is easier to lay guilt on you than to address the fundamental problems within their system. No wonder why you have too much stress in your life.
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Post by the light works on Dec 13, 2022 1:52:41 GMT
you can fix dad leaving the brand new computer on all night, through software. on my laptop, you go to settings, system, power & sleep; to get to the settings for what it does if it's left idling. I would expect it to be the same on a desktop only without the "on battery" line in the power & sleep menu. I have mine set to go to sleep if I leave it idling for an hour; and turn off the screen after a half hour (plugged in) What everything in my life comes down to is the question of if I need to remain where I am or head on out. A part of me is yearning to head out somewhere, try my luck in starting over, and see what happens while I still have some level of physical and mental ability to do so. Another part of me is saying that if I leave, this entire town is probably done for. I'm basically propping up my parents, the newspaper, and based on the reactions I get a number of local charities. I'm also helping to hold up the congregation I go to, and am doing a fair bit online for various groups as well. it's a running joke that this town would fall apart without me, but the fact of the matter is, I took most of a month off in 2019, and I only had to to tech support over the phone a handful of times. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 13, 2022 1:55:18 GMT
The engineering term for this is a "Single Point of Failure". The one element of a system that if it breaks will result in the shutdown of the whole system. You, Iron, are that element in these systems. I would not be surprised that these organizations know you are a SPF, but don't want take the action to fix it. It is easier to lay guilt on you than to address the fundamental problems within their system. No wonder why you have too much stress in your life. and the solution is to tell them that there needs to be a designated successor, available to pick up the failure point. |
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Post by rmc on Dec 13, 2022 9:20:43 GMT
addendum: I'm on my second mountain dew of the morning. we're planning for an end of year price increase at the car wash, so I have to translate current price levels ($X.xx for Y minutes) to seconds per coin, and adjust seconds per coin and then translate back to price levels, then adjust for what will provide a reasonable balance of coins for an appropriate working time for the customer, keeping in mind that customers cannot wrap their brains around letting one coin drop before stuffing in another one. meanwhile, we've got locks sticking on the new shampoo vac, which we still haven't found a longer shampoo brush hose for. also, it can take (dollar) tokens, while the simple vacs can't, so we're trying to set its price to even dollar amounts, so people can run it on tokens - which we will be able to sell in credit card transactions, now, because the delay in getting the card reader modem reprogrammed is interfering with the automatic wash, so Mrs T was going to add in another credit card processing service, until I looked up and found the service we are switching to (you'll remember we started the process by ending our former service last week) also can do a freestanding card processing capability, so now we're going to have the ability to do direct sales by credit card. - and we're still waiting for a bid to add card readers to the self serve bays. - so until we get the card reader at the automatic back up and running, we will have an on-site attendant to process credit card sales of tokens or coupons, and we should probably have vending products available, too. (towels) just in case you're feeling alone in your stress levels. Yee ol Mountain Dew, eh? Two warnings on that one... coffee and sugar too for that matter... white matter. Vasoconstriction, transient higher blood pressure, both (1) cardiovascular and (2) cerebral small vessel disease and thereby white matter in the brain over time or even heart disease. If you get an MRI of your head for any reason, and they mention white matter and CSVD slightly more than age group, immediately rethink stuff like caffeine, sugar, etc. |
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Post by wvengineer on Dec 13, 2022 14:06:09 GMT
The engineering term for this is a "Single Point of Failure". The one element of a system that if it breaks will result in the shutdown of the whole system. You, Iron, are that element in these systems. I would not be surprised that these organizations know you are a SPF, but don't want take the action to fix it. It is easier to lay guilt on you than to address the fundamental problems within their system. No wonder why you have too much stress in your life. and the solution is to tell them that there needs to be a designated successor, available to pick up the failure point. Amen! From there, once that successor is designated and you tell them you will be out fora given time and they are to call that person, you then turn your phone off and do not communicate with them until the time you said you would be back. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 13, 2022 14:17:07 GMT
addendum: I'm on my second mountain dew of the morning. we're planning for an end of year price increase at the car wash, so I have to translate current price levels ($X.xx for Y minutes) to seconds per coin, and adjust seconds per coin and then translate back to price levels, then adjust for what will provide a reasonable balance of coins for an appropriate working time for the customer, keeping in mind that customers cannot wrap their brains around letting one coin drop before stuffing in another one. meanwhile, we've got locks sticking on the new shampoo vac, which we still haven't found a longer shampoo brush hose for. also, it can take (dollar) tokens, while the simple vacs can't, so we're trying to set its price to even dollar amounts, so people can run it on tokens - which we will be able to sell in credit card transactions, now, because the delay in getting the card reader modem reprogrammed is interfering with the automatic wash, so Mrs T was going to add in another credit card processing service, until I looked up and found the service we are switching to (you'll remember we started the process by ending our former service last week) also can do a freestanding card processing capability, so now we're going to have the ability to do direct sales by credit card. - and we're still waiting for a bid to add card readers to the self serve bays. - so until we get the card reader at the automatic back up and running, we will have an on-site attendant to process credit card sales of tokens or coupons, and we should probably have vending products available, too. (towels) just in case you're feeling alone in your stress levels. Yee ol Mountain Dew, eh? Two warnings on that one... coffee and sugar too for that matter... white matter. Vasoconstriction, transient higher blood pressure, both (1) cardiovascular and (2) cerebral small vessel disease and thereby white matter in the brain over time or even heart disease. If you get an MRI of your head for any reason, and they mention white matter and CSVD slightly more than age group, immediately rethink stuff like caffeine, sugar, etc. it is an ongoing goal to NOT be dependent on caffeine and sugar. getting back to where I'm allowed to wake up at my own pace would help with that. |
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Post by rmc on Dec 13, 2022 18:05:21 GMT
Yee ol Mountain Dew, eh? Two warnings on that one... coffee and sugar too for that matter... white matter. Vasoconstriction, transient higher blood pressure, both (1) cardiovascular and (2) cerebral small vessel disease and thereby white matter in the brain over time or even heart disease. If you get an MRI of your head for any reason, and they mention white matter and CSVD slightly more than age group, immediately rethink stuff like caffeine, sugar, etc. it is an ongoing goal to NOT be dependent on caffeine and sugar. getting back to where I'm allowed to wake up at my own pace would help with that. I still suggest my previous post here regarding getting deeper sleep. The post involving Glycine, Hops, Passionflower, Taurine, etc. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 13, 2022 19:17:08 GMT
it is an ongoing goal to NOT be dependent on caffeine and sugar. getting back to where I'm allowed to wake up at my own pace would help with that. I still suggest my previous post here regarding getting deeper sleep. The post involving Glycine, Hops, Passionflower, Taurine, etc. being on-call for the fire district kind of precludes sleep aids. and I found when Mrs T tried giving me a presumably "safe no drowsiness" herbal remedy that still left me not feeling like I couldn't wake up the next day, I seem to have a low threshold of side effects. |
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Post by rmc on Dec 13, 2022 20:34:36 GMT
I still suggest my previous post here regarding getting deeper sleep. The post involving Glycine, Hops, Passionflower, Taurine, etc. being on-call for the fire district kind of precludes sleep aids. and I found when Mrs T tried giving me a presumably "safe no drowsiness" herbal remedy that still left me not feeling like I couldn't wake up the next day, I seem to have a low threshold of side effects. On a day off or other vacation (if and when you get one of those... likely not real often, but anyway) Try the Hops, Passionflower, Glycine, Taurine, and Phosphatidylserine combination. Look them up in the meantime. Ask Mrs. TLW too. |
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Post by ironhold on Dec 13, 2022 21:06:55 GMT
The engineering term for this is a "Single Point of Failure". The one element of a system that if it breaks will result in the shutdown of the whole system. You, Iron, are that element in these systems. I would not be surprised that these organizations know you are a SPF, but don't want take the action to fix it. It is easier to lay guilt on you than to address the fundamental problems within their system. No wonder why you have too much stress in your life. and the solution is to tell them that there needs to be a designated successor, available to pick up the failure point. I've tried, as have others. For example, during the football season we publish a special Saturday morning edition, a tabloid-sized bit that looks at the varsity and junior varsity games. We deliver it to the bulk of the businesses in town, and you really need to be on the road between 6:30 and 7 AM in order to get it done before traffic gets heavy. On a good morning, if I have one of my parents with me I can hit the road about 6:45 and be done by 10. A few years ago, the paper tried to hire a temp who would handle these football papers. Remember how I said you need to be out at about 6:30 AM for best results? Circulation contacted me at 8 AM the first morning to say that the temp only just now called in to say that they couldn't make it, and it happened again the next Saturday. After that I was asked to take over the deliveries again. Since then, we haven't been able to secure a temporary hire to handle those Saturday editions. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 13, 2022 22:17:32 GMT
and the solution is to tell them that there needs to be a designated successor, available to pick up the failure point. I've tried, as have others. For example, during the football season we publish a special Saturday morning edition, a tabloid-sized bit that looks at the varsity and junior varsity games. We deliver it to the bulk of the businesses in town, and you really need to be on the road between 6:30 and 7 AM in order to get it done before traffic gets heavy. On a good morning, if I have one of my parents with me I can hit the road about 6:45 and be done by 10. A few years ago, the paper tried to hire a temp who would handle these football papers. Remember how I said you need to be out at about 6:30 AM for best results? Circulation contacted me at 8 AM the first morning to say that the temp only just now called in to say that they couldn't make it, and it happened again the next Saturday. After that I was asked to take over the deliveries again. Since then, we haven't been able to secure a temporary hire to handle those Saturday editions. then it's time to discuss how much your irreplaceable talents re worth. |
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Post by ironhold on Dec 13, 2022 23:21:12 GMT
I've tried, as have others. For example, during the football season we publish a special Saturday morning edition, a tabloid-sized bit that looks at the varsity and junior varsity games. We deliver it to the bulk of the businesses in town, and you really need to be on the road between 6:30 and 7 AM in order to get it done before traffic gets heavy. On a good morning, if I have one of my parents with me I can hit the road about 6:45 and be done by 10. A few years ago, the paper tried to hire a temp who would handle these football papers. Remember how I said you need to be out at about 6:30 AM for best results? Circulation contacted me at 8 AM the first morning to say that the temp only just now called in to say that they couldn't make it, and it happened again the next Saturday. After that I was asked to take over the deliveries again. Since then, we haven't been able to secure a temporary hire to handle those Saturday editions. then it's time to discuss how much your irreplaceable talents re worth. The publishing editor has already told me that we're too broke for them to pay me what I'm worth. I've tried repeatedly to find part-time work to supplement everything, but to no avail. Either something goes wrong during the application / interview process (generally, it's because the company is using some automated screening examination where you have to magically know everything the test programmer was thinking at the time) or no one is interested. I'm doing volunteer work as time allows, but that's the limit of it. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 14, 2022 1:05:14 GMT
then it's time to discuss how much your irreplaceable talents re worth. The publishing editor has already told me that we're too broke for them to pay me what I'm worth. I've tried repeatedly to find part-time work to supplement everything, but to no avail. Either something goes wrong during the application / interview process (generally, it's because the company is using some automated screening examination where you have to magically know everything the test programmer was thinking at the time) or no one is interested. I'm doing volunteer work as time allows, but that's the limit of it. then they need to reevaluate their business plan. |
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Post by ironhold on Dec 14, 2022 1:52:21 GMT
The publishing editor has already told me that we're too broke for them to pay me what I'm worth. I've tried repeatedly to find part-time work to supplement everything, but to no avail. Either something goes wrong during the application / interview process (generally, it's because the company is using some automated screening examination where you have to magically know everything the test programmer was thinking at the time) or no one is interested. I'm doing volunteer work as time allows, but that's the limit of it. then they need to reevaluate their business plan. Newspapers in general are struggling, with smaller local newspapers like ours being on the brink of extinction. It's simply that the industry as a whole is in peril despite how important we are in keeping the public informed and educated. |
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Post by GTCGreg on Dec 14, 2022 3:58:22 GMT
then they need to reevaluate their business plan. Newspapers in general are struggling, with smaller local newspapers like ours being on the brink of extinction. It's simply that the industry as a whole is in peril despite how important we are in keeping the public informed and educated. Around here, all of the small local papers were bought out by the two major Chicago papers. Either the Chicago Tribune or Sun Times. All of the local papers now run the same generic stories with maybe one or two local stories thrown in. Nothing really of community interest. |
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Post by the light works on Dec 14, 2022 6:41:06 GMT
Newspapers in general are struggling, with smaller local newspapers like ours being on the brink of extinction. It's simply that the industry as a whole is in peril despite how important we are in keeping the public informed and educated. Around here, all of the small local papers were bought out by the two major Chicago papers. Either the Chicago Tribune or Sun Times. All of the local papers now run the same generic stories with maybe one or two local stories thrown in. Nothing really of community interest. and as I've mentioned in the past, my regional paper decided to reinvent itself as a local paper, and basically dumped 75% of their circulation area. |
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Post by WhutScreenName on Dec 14, 2022 14:30:09 GMT
My local paper comes free to us once a week (or maybe it's every other week) on Wednesday and is also the buyers guide. I'm pretty sure there's some weekend edition that can be purchased, but I get my news online now, so don't really know for sure.
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