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Post by c64 on Jul 25, 2014 23:21:28 GMT
Turn north, lift my kilt & moon England! In Germany, the two cities of Beuel and Bonn had agreed to build the first bridge over the Rhine river. Bonn, the larger city had built the bridge but Beuel wasn't happy with the location and refused to pay their share because they had to build new roads to make use of the bridge. Guess where this famous piece of art is located and in which direction it points:  |
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Post by Lex Of Sydney Australia on Jul 26, 2014 8:27:10 GMT
Turn north, lift my kilt & moon England! In Germany, the two cities of Beuel and Bonn had agreed to build the first bridge over the Rhine river. Bonn, the larger city had built the bridge but Beuel wasn't happy with the location and refused to pay their share because they had to build new roads to make use of the bridge. Guess where this famous piece of art is located and in which direction it points: ROTFLMAO!  & people say the Germans have no sense of humour!  |
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Post by c64 on Jul 26, 2014 16:35:45 GMT
In Germany, the two cities of Beuel and Bonn had agreed to build the first bridge over the Rhine river. Bonn, the larger city had built the bridge but Beuel wasn't happy with the location and refused to pay their share because they had to build new roads to make use of the bridge. Guess where this famous piece of art is located and in which direction it points: ROTFLMAO! & people say the Germans have no sense of humour! There is more to the story. The citizens of Beuel had put up a sculpture with an angry washerwoman about to throw a wooden pantofel on their end of the bridge. (they had had paid their share when they did that) In WW-2, the bridge was blown up by the Wehrmacht and the "Bröckemännche" (little bridge man) fell out of its socket. A pubowner then took it and had buried it in his yard to prevent that one of the soldiers could take it as a souvenir. When the bridge was rebuilt, the Bröckemännche was too damaged and had to be restored. The mason had written an invoice for "Dem Bröckemännche de Botz jeflickt" (fixed the trousers of the little bridge man). The sculpture of the washerwoman was lost. The restored Bröckemännche was then pointed to Frankfurt because Berlin the old capitol was behind the iron curtain and a new capitol city had to be elected. And Bonn and Frankfurt were competing for becoming the capitol of Germany. In 1960, the Bröckemännche was destroyed by vandalism and a crude copy (as seen in the picture) was made. In 2008, the Bröckemännche and the washerwoman were replicated using computer models based on old photographs (but real hand made) and put back to their original locations.   |
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Post by Lex Of Sydney Australia on Sept 3, 2014 6:42:17 GMT
One evening a Husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in 'Slim Fast'. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded. The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. 'What the Hell is this?' he said to himself as a little dust cloud appeared when he shook them out. 'April', he hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put Talcum Powder in my underwear?'
She replied, 'It's not talcum powder; it's Miracle Grow.'The morale of this tail: NEVER TRY & OUT DO A WOMAN!!!!!!! |
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Post by ironhold on Sept 3, 2014 14:35:59 GMT
(I first saw this joke elsewhere, and so I take no credit for it.)
One night, a burglar broke into someone's home. As he began to rummage through their belongings, he heard a voice cry "Jesus is watching you!". Shocked by the sound, he quickly scanned about to no avail. Believing that he was hearing things, he once more went back to robbing the place.
"Jesus is watching you!" the voice again cried.
The burglar once again began to look about, and once again saw no one present. He went back to work, and once more heard the cry.
As he looked around again, he saw a parrot sitting in a corner of the room. "Jesus is watching you!" it croaked.
The burglar began to laugh at this point, and walked over to the bird. "You're a clever bird," he said. "What's your name?"
"Moses."
"Moses? What kind of person would name their parrot 'Moses'?"
"The kind of person who would name their Rottweiler 'Jesus'."
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Post by the light works on Sept 3, 2014 18:00:32 GMT
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Post by The Urban Mythbuster on Sept 3, 2014 18:32:57 GMT
Sounds like something that you might see posted on The Onion, which is a wonderful fake news outlet...not to be confused with The Chive which focuses on memes and boobs. |
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Post by the light works on Sept 3, 2014 18:41:33 GMT
Sounds like something that you might see posted on The Onion, which is a wonderful fake news outlet...not to be confused with The Chive which focuses on memes and boobs. right. or the Garlic, which is a restaurant. |
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Post by The Urban Mythbuster on Sept 3, 2014 18:45:39 GMT
Sounds like something that you might see posted on The Onion, which is a wonderful fake news outlet...not to be confused with The Chive which focuses on memes and boobs. right. or the Garlic, which is a restaurant. That leaves 'The Scallion' and 'The Shallot' up for grabs... |
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Post by Lex Of Sydney Australia on Sept 11, 2014 5:11:17 GMT
right. or the Garlic, which is a restaurant. That leaves 'The Scallion' and 'The Shallot' up for grabs... Sounds like the names of some kind of a French bedroom toys if you ask me.  |
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Post by The Urban Mythbuster on Sept 11, 2014 12:39:05 GMT
That leaves 'The Scallion' and 'The Shallot' up for grabs... Sounds like the names of some kind of a French bedroom toys if you ask me. Wow! That took an unexpected turn!  |
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Post by Lex Of Sydney Australia on Sept 11, 2014 13:26:14 GMT
Sounds like the names of some kind of a French bedroom toys if you ask me. Wow! That took an unexpected turn! Sorry I was planning a friends Hens Night & I had some friends over at the time helping me (or trying to) & we'd had a few too many when I typed that.  |
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Post by The Urban Mythbuster on Sept 11, 2014 13:35:22 GMT
Wow! That took an unexpected turn! Sorry I was planning a friends Hens Night & I had some friends over at the time helping me (or trying to) & we'd had a few too many when I typed that. No need to apologize, just very unexpected!  |
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Post by silverdragon on Sept 13, 2014 9:15:34 GMT
right. or the Garlic, which is a restaurant. That leaves 'The Scallion' and 'The Shallot' up for grabs... No... Dont.... Quiet. Dont do it. I want to add a bit. I cant. No more onion jokes. I would like to add a layer of new jokes. They may make you cry with laughter. But I cant. As they say, That Shallot ..... [thats ya lot....] Badum Tish.. I will be here till Friday, .......my wife locked me out. |
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Post by silverdragon on Sept 13, 2014 9:18:07 GMT
Sounds like the names of some kind of a French bedroom toys if you ask me. Wow! That took an unexpected turn! It wasnt a Turn, it was an Albatross..... On a stick...... Oh heck, you knew this was coming. |
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Post by silverdragon on Sept 13, 2014 9:31:35 GMT
Sod it, its that time again.
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Post by c64 on Sept 13, 2014 19:53:55 GMT
Sod it, its that time again. Most people nowadays won't get those jokes. Just last Thursday, a coworker was called to the secretary because her computer won't accept pendrives any more. When he came back he said that there was nothing wrong with the computer. So I had asked if he had a 27B-6. When he looked puzzled I asked him if it has "fixed itself" which had confused him more... |
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Post by Lex Of Sydney Australia on Sept 20, 2014 15:58:47 GMT
Q: What is it called when Batman leaves church early?  A: Christian Bale.
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Post by c64 on Oct 10, 2014 11:33:53 GMT
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Post by c64 on Oct 11, 2014 9:39:13 GMT
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